I was going to write a poem about this, but I figured I would just freestyle this as I type. It would be kind of fun, right? At least I wouldn’t get bored.
And I don’t think I’m ever bored, like having nothing to do, but more like boredom, the act of wanting to do nothing.
This is when the devil comes out to play. All of my thoughts no matter how negative, irrational, or depressing, comes seeking back to me. This is when depression, insomnia, addiction, and much more toxic situations tend to happen.
“How did you screw that relationship up?” “When will I ever buckle down and focus on my health?” “I don’t like the position in life I’m in right now.” These thoughts and more circle around my head as I sit lazily on the couch in a dark living room. Nothing but my phone in hand and the devil in my thoughts.
Now when I say the devil, I don’t mean any specific devil in any religion or belief. I’m speaking of the devil as the looming and ruminating toxicity that can drown you in your sorrows if you don’t take control.
So how do I take control? Social media? Video games and television? All distractions. They are like drugs, a temporary fix to an issue that is clearly being ignored from fear or anxiety.
We don’t want to attack these thoughts, but they will not leave until you confront them; kind of like a recurring nightmare that you will keep getting until you face the monster. We must not ignore this monster.
Yes, we must stay busy. But not with distractions. With productivity. Reflect, read, learn, and gain a sense of mindfulness with yourself. Boredom will happen, but you can set up the fences so the devil will not come to play. And if he still finds his way in, which he is really good at, you will be ready for it. You will not run. You will not hide. You will fight. Keep fighting.